What’s the Hardest Thing You did?

It was a simple signature.

Yes, placing my signature on a piece of paper was the hardest thing I ever did.

Only that, the paper was the death certificate of my father.

Minutes after we lost him, the door of the emergency room opened and a nurse walked out. I was numb, my mom was silently crying in a corner chair. She asked for the wife and daughter of the deceased. We went inside along with my aunty to be told that we are to fill out the form for his death certificate.

I didn’t want my mom to do this. I slowly took the pen, opened the cap, and fearfully glanced at the first page of the form.

The very first question broke my heart into a million pieces- Name of the deceased. I had to fill out my dad’s name. The idea that he’s no more with us, hit from all sides like the shards of a broken mirror.

Big blots of tears silently glided down my cheeks as I proceeded to the rest of the form. I whimpered, took a pause, cried again, and managed to fill it out.

I don’t remember much of it. It’s all a blur now. In the end, it was time for the signature. I went to the column, but couldn’t bring myself to sign it. My aunt tightly held my hand and after a while, I placed my signature on that paper that would make my father’s death official.

Life isn’t easy. A little cruel too.

Originally published at http://onewhereshewrites.wordpress.com on January 1, 2020.